Frequently asked questions (FAQs)

In very general terms, you can expect to be treated with respect, dignity, and reciprocity.

You can expect curiosity, questions, transparency, honesty, and a respect for storytelling rights.

From here, the expectations become something of a “choose your own adventure” based on what best aligns with your needs. For further conversation about what these conversations can can look like, please feel free to contact me.

This is a tremendously confusing question for me, mostly because unlike gourmet chefs or ceramicists or surgeons, the skills that are honed in therapy don’t produce a physical result that can be uniformly compared.

I can tell you what I’m drawn to, which is queer/trans thriving, living in liminal spaces (gender, culture, presentation, ability), holding complexity and expansiveness, and exposing recruitment campaigns run by systemic and societal expectations of value.

Mainly, I work with other 2SLGBTQIA+ people and am honoured to witness and gather the expanses of knowledge we hold. In terms of topics and problems we’ve talked and worked on together, the following are a few:

anger | depression | anxiety | overwhelm | shame | guilt | gender | sexuality | disability | sex | isolation | trauma | fear | grief & loss | self-esteem | confidence | values | communication | bullying

Contrary to popular belief, Narrative is not exactly “everyone has their own stories”.

From my understanding, Narrative practice is based on the tenet that our identities and selves are constructed and maintained by the stories that we tell about ourselves and the stories that other people tell about us.

Narrative conversations can look like:

• Sifting through and identifying stories written either by systems or people in our lives,

• Exploring and externalizing problems (making problems like Anxiety into something we can talk at and negotiate with),

• Mapping where you are and exploring where you might like to go,

• Mulling over if or how you might like invite others into your life,

• Trash-talking Shame and Guilt, tracing histories of Care or Agency,

• None of the above, choose your own adventure, talk about Minecraft (nothing is irrelevant, it’s all context), I’ll ask you questions that you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. Narrative is fundamentally co-created, which means we both have influence over the conversations we have.

There are little biscuit tins of the main aspects of Narrative Therapy (NT) in the Home, About, and Offerings sections of this site. If you would like to learn more about it, I suggest clicking here for the answer to this question from the Dulwich Centre out of Adelaide, Australia. I might also suggest David Denborough’s book, Retelling the Stories of Our Lives (2014) as another useful illustrative resource of what NT can look and sound like.

You absolutely do not need to have a PowerPoint or any other modality of your entire life story ready and laid out. I trust that we will get to all the important things relevant to our work in due time (i.e., when you are comfortable and choose to share particular stories).

That said, if you have already crafted a PowerPoint (or something similar) and sharing it with me is of interest, I will absolutely take a look.

All of my conversations are 1 hour in length with an extra 15-minute buffer at the end. I trust you to show up when you can and are ready, and sometimes that means running behind schedule.

I also know life happens and sometimes taking care of ourselves and/or others calls for a cancellation or delay. If that’s the case, please let me know as soon as you can. If I do not hear from you, you will probably receive an email or text from me to check in—this is not meant to invite Guilt or Shame, I just genuinely want to check in about how you are doing.

Longer or shorter sessions are also an option, and will still include the 15-minute buffer. Let me know if this something you are interested in and we can figure out what works best.

Canadian clients
Autodeposit e-transfer: emily@stonefruitcounselling.com

International clients
PayPal: https://paypal.me/stonefruittcf.

Receipts
I do send receipts after payment is received; please allow a few business days to receive receipts after payment (please send me a nudge if it is time sensitive).

Insurance Coverage
I am in the process of registering with the ACCT (Association of Cooperative Counselling Therapists of BC). If you have extended healthcare coverage by the the following insurance companies, you may be eligible for reimbursement up to a certain annual limit AFTER I am registered with ACCT (pending, ETA dependent on human capacity (mine)).

Rates
Details of services and rates of payment can be found in the Offerings section under “Rates for Services”

To get the most out of our time together, some folks find the following to be of use:

The Parking Lot
If you find yourself at the end of a conversation without touching on the things you wanted to talk about, consider jotting down a few notes in a notebook or in a notes app on your phone to bring up next time.

Pick One Thing
If Overwhelm or Apathy is present, consider picking one thing (only one) to shift or mull over between our conversations. Some examples of this might look like:

• substituting "I can't" with "I'm struggling with this";

• considering what relationship you would like to have with Anger;

• trying to eat more regularly;

• counting to 10 before responding to others when Frustration is present.

Look for Patterns
If you're noticing the same dynamics or feelings present, consider doing some data collection: what's happening around you when these things occur?

• Have you slept/ate/hydrated?

• What part or role are you playing (honestly & objectively as humanly possible)?

• What kind of media do you engage with?

  • Does it reflect your values in action?

  • Zoom out a little and see if you can find any patterns linking your thought processes to the movies, books, social media, videos, or podcasts you engage with on a regular basis.

Mapping some of these things out can give us a solid base to start reworking some ingrained narratives during our conversations.

There is a chance that we may run into each other in the world (especially in smaller or close-knit communities). I would very much like to chat with you about how you might like to navigate that should it arise, and how that might differ from place to place.

As a blanket statement, out of respect for your privacy, confidentiality, and consent, I will not say hello first. I will take cues from you in social situations. If you are comfortable with saying hello in public, I am honoured to reciprocate. If you would rather not be acknowledged, not a single problem.

Please also know that I will also never intentionally ignore you when in public, should you feel up for saying hi; I am usually on some kind of train of thought and am probably just vibing on a different plane of reality.

Not necessarily! Don’t get me wrong, some conversations can be heavy, but the overall experience of counselling does not actually need to suck or dredge up traumatic memories in detail.

The intention is to co-create a respectful and collaborative space. We do not have to talk about things head-on: sometimes, exploring what kind of stories or games or shows you like can open up conversations that run parallel to difficult subjects, but never dive in.

Believe it or not, we might actually end up cackling together as we explore shame, guilt, isolation, or others that give us a hard time.